Thursday, August 3, 2006

Let the Panic Attack Begin



So, thanks to a comment Liz left on the last post I now know that White-Hot! is making it's way out into the big, bad world on Pre-Order at the Mills And Boon site... And now I can officially schedule in my panic attack...

I wonder of authors ever lose this fear? You put your heart and soul into it, and this was the first one of my own that I cried in when writing it (mind you that could have been PMT). But you just never know how readers will take to it. And since each book becomes an extension of yourself, which is why I often refer to them as children, you can't help but feel protective...Like watching a child take it's first trip away from home. You want it to do well, you hope that if people don't like it there will be a larger proportion of people that will... and you then get to add to that the fact, that unlike children, the failure in the world of one may lead to a chain reaction that may end your career... Over-react? me? Nah...

But this one is a bit special, therefore garnering even more panic than usual. Because this was my first foray out of the comfortable and familiar surroundings of the Tender line into a line that I couldn't even read to research before I started writing! And you know how I do like to harp on about the subject of doing your research before you begin...

So this one was a shot in the dark. And I just wrote what felt right writing and must bow down to the superior knowledge of the Eds who bought it and said it was bang on for the line. Thing is, in my little world of paranoia, with the line having been out there for several months now, and it has to be said doing rather well! - I have now read so many great pieces of work from other authors that I'm thinking - Oh crap - what if I don't measure up??? Just cos I like it doesn't mean others will... Gulp... And now that I know Liz is going to read it I am poo-ing myself...

Any day now I fully expect there to be a knock at the door and a policeman with a charge of 'Pretending to be able to write' in his hand...Will the paranoia NEVER END???? (or maybe thats PMT talking again???)

Mind you, worse comes to the worst...The cover is certainly gonna be worth it...

11 comments:

Kate Walker said...

The scary truth is, Trish, that that panic never goes away. I just had my 50th book accepted and I still chew my nails when each book goes to my editor - or comes out on sale.

But I also happen to think that that's actually a good thing. I lkike to think that it keeps me sharp. There's a danger in getting complacent or even confident and going through that dreadful twisting of nerves sensation stops that from ever happening.

Good luck with White-Hot - I hope it's a major succes for you. The cover should make lots of people want to pick it up

Kate

Kate H said...

I've just had the same panic over delivering #24 (see my blog post from Monday - there's a good link to a site on Impostor Syndrome and dealing with it. Also read my readers' comments as they apply to you too).

Good luck with the book. It'll hit the shelves here in about 3 weeks, so I'll be rushing out to get my copy then.

You'll be fine. Deep breaths. Repeat: I *can* do this...

Margaret McDonagh said...

I don't want to add to the panic, Trish, but I've ordered a copy, too!

But the panic is normal. Well, I hope it is because I am utterly TERRIFIED of anyone reading anything I have written and exposing me as an utter fraud. Don't worry about that policeman, he'll be far too busy battering MY door down!!!

White Hot looks fabulous, I can't wait to read it and you already know from your wonderful Tenders that you are not a fraud but an excellent writer.

Love,
Mags

Donna Alward said...

Wooo wooo!

I'll jump on the paranoia train!

LOL I like how Kate said it keeps her sharp. This is one of those cases Trish where you need to trust the editors. They aren't going to approve a book that won't sell. FWIW I've read White-Hot and it's wonderful...so take a valium and get back to your next masterpiece (in my mind one of your strongest yet!).

xxoo

Liz Fielding said...

No, Trish, the paranoia (thanks for writing that so I could copy the spelling, Donna -- I had a complete mental blank!) never ends. And that's the truth. (Is anyone else old enough to remember Laugh In?)

Nicole Reising said...

You are too funny! I'm sure the book will be great! Editors aren't about to waste time and money if it isn't!! *grin* But I so get your feelings! Each thing I've written I've always felt like it was a part of me and had to 'brace' myself for the possibility of rejection. Such a contradiction - I desperately want people to read my stories and fall in love with them as I have but... then too don't want them to read them... what if they don't like them! *grin* -

Cole

Trish said...

Phew!!!!! If you guys can all have the same paranoia then maybe I'm not as insane as I thought... Well, not as *completely* insane as I'd thought... ;)

And I do agree that it does keep us sharp. There's nothing quite like the thought of public humiliation to keep you on your toes...

Well, if any of you do read it and hate it - You can't say you weren't warned...

Nicola Marsh said...

Trish,
I think everyone who sits before a keyboard or puts pen to paper can identify with you here! I totally get it!!!

I can't wait to read this one!!! It's going to be as fab as all your books, that I'm certain of! :)

Fiona Harper said...

Trish, Kate(s), anybody else...? I'm joining you in the paranoia club. Convinced the current book is not up to scratch and will dive bomb. After such a good response for my first effort I can see people shaking their heads and saying, "It's okay-ish, but it's not as good as her first..."

Glad to know this sinking feeling is good for soemthing!

Trish, White Hot is already winging it's way to me from M&B. Can't wait!

Fi

subliminal said...

Nice--have you visited ww.innertalk.com and seen their subliminal stuff?

allyblake said...

Trish, as one of the lucky few who have read this book, I just have to say, in the words of the great Douglas Adams:

don't panic

And if in doubt, please just go here on a daily basis to remember why ;).

http://allyblake.blogspot.com/2006/07/must-read.html