Trish: So, Gabe, you know the way Alex was so helpful when I was writing his story? I was wondering if there was any chance at all you might help me out a little with yours...? (bats eyelids and pouts)
Gabe: I didn't ask you to tell it.
Trish: Erm, well, no, but -
Gabe: I don't do none of those touchy-feely-emotions stuff the Squirt seems so fine with.
Trish: (mumbling) Yes, well Alex wasn't giving much away either. (he's the squirt you understand dear blog reader) Mind you 'touchy' and 'feely' and a little bit more than that doesn't seem to be something either of you have a problem with, with the right woman...
Gabe: (folds arms)
Trish: (clears throat) It's just that I have this tradition of telling peoples stories from both points of view... and right now you're causing me a few problems with that...
Gabe: So I should just lie down on a sofa while you ask me what the problem is and take notes?
Trish: (thinking about the lying down on a sofa option...mmm...) No, I'm just thinking that maybe if you at least let me know what's going on then I might have an idea why you're behaving the way you are with Ash.
Gabe: She wants to know something, she can ask me.
Trish: And you'd tell her?
Gabe: (shrugs) Depends on what she asks.
Trish: Well, it's just she's tried asking you things and you haven't been that keen to share...
Trish: (really understanding why Ash wants to shake him so often) Don't you think you two might get on better if she knew why you were being so... so....
Trish: Erm... difficult.
Gabe: (smiles a very small smile)
Trish: (thinks - hang on a minute) Are you trying to confuse her on purpose?
Gabe: Why would I do that?
Trish: (seriously considering writing a scene where the hero is run-over-by-a-bus) Why would you do that Gabe?
Gabe: How many of these things did you say you'd done?
Gabe: You'd think you'd know why people do the things they do by now then wouldn't you?
Trish: (thinking about something larger than a bus) Every relationship is different.
Gabe: I'm not in a (unfolds arms to make invisible speech marks) 'relationship' with Ash.
Trish: Now Gabe, that would be a bit of a fib, wouldn't it?
Gabe: That's a good move, 'cos you callin' me a liar is gonna get me to tell you stuff a helluva lot faster, isn't it?
Trish: (closes notepad with a sigh) So if it's not a relationship then what is it?
Gabe: You're the one telling the story, why don't you tell me?
Trish: (really getting a tad irritated by now) Has anyone ever told you, you have problems?
Gabe: (refolding arms) You think? Well I'm not the one chatting to a fictional character, am I?
Trish: You do know I can replace you?
Gabe: You think?
Trish: Ash might be better off with someone who talks to her a bit more.
Gabe: You go right ahead and try to find someone that can play that woman at her own game the way I can. Just keep in mind that I know her better than anyone else.
Trish: (thinking he doesn't maybe know her as well as he might like to think he does) And you'd be okay with her with someone else would you?
Gabe: No, I said you could try to find someone else. I didn't say you would.
Trish: Meaning you would be fine with it if I did?
Gabe: (leaning in a little) I don't think I said that either.
Trish: So let's just say, for the sake of argument, you were run over by a bus in the next scene... She should just, what, pine for you for the next 30,000 odd words?
Trish: (lightbulb going off over head) So you're saying you don't trust her?
Gabe: (unfolding an arm to waggle a long finger at me) Don't think I don't know what you're doing writer girl.
Trish: What did she do that you don't trust her?
Gabe: We're done here.
Trish: (following him) Yeah, but if you could just tell me what she did...?
Gabe: (still walking away) Why don't you just try reading what you've written?
Trish: Because I've read it like a gazillion times and the most that happens is you give me a line here or there. One line. You're not helping! Don't you want to live happily ever after with Ash?
Gabe: Maybe you should ask her that question. (slams door on way out)
Trish:(shouting through closed door) Fine then! I will!
Dear Blog Reader - is it just me or is this guy... well... isn't he??? I'm just gonna go open a bottle of wine and see if I can get Ash to talk to me...