Friday, January 8, 2010

Back To Work Day Five...



Chapter three took more adjustment than I'd thought it would. What was I thinking when I wrote that chapter the first time?! Apart from the fact my heroine was changing personalities faster than I refresh my coffee supply when writing (which is fast during the wee small hours - trust me!), my hero pretty much launched himself at her like some kind of rampant rabbit. No wonder my editor thought the kiss was too soon. Were we trying to get to the 'good stuff' that ups the word count in a Modern Heat perchance, Trish? I'll admit there were low points when I just wanted the darn book written but for crying out loud. If he moves that fast the first love scene would have lasted less than half a page... now there's fantasy escapism for ya!

Since the original chapter three and four both lost scenes, I've added the original chapter four (or what's left of it) to the wordcount meter, but right now I'm kinda stuck on the dance scene where the kiss scene originally was. Originally I had my heroine dancing with other guys right under my hero's nose and my hero not liking it one little bit. That part has stayed. I then had her disappear and my hero went and found her for that kiss and an ultimatum. I'm now replacing it - or trying to - with the addition of a dance my editor suggested might work better. Thing is, I LOVE the idea of him stalking into the crowd to claim her for a dance that leaves her all hot and bothered, I just don't quite know HOW to get the effect I want. Well not yet anyway. In my search for inspiration I found a quote from George Bernard Shaw that says:

Dancing: The vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music.”

... which is EXACTLY what I'm aiming for. It's a way of getting two people who are fighting a fierce attraction to each other (hence the working title Irresistable) very close together physically with the opportunity for ramping up the sexual tension by having them fully clothed and in a public place surrounded by a bunch of very proper, somewhat uptight people. It could be a very tactile, sensual scene, if I get it right. Problem is, to the world of dance, I'm the equivalent of those Disney elephants in tutu's. Now obviously my hero and heroine will be way better at it than me, but when I think of sexy, sensual dances I've been trained to see Dancing With The Stars in my head. Trouble is, as gorgeous and sensual and sexy as those dances can be, I also know how much training it took to get that effect.

Ah, but Trish this is fantasy, I can hear you say. Well, yes it is my friends. But it's also supposed to be believeable and as much chemistry as my lovely re-casted hero and heroine have, I'm having a hard time convincing myself that they'll both have learnt to dance the tango, or anything similar, so they both know the steps and don't end up stomping on each others toes and tripping over. I think what I need to do is take the 'scent' of that dance and think about how they could move together to Tango-type music (maybe, maybe not when it comes to the music - we shall see). For example, I love both these pics. I think both poses are doable. I can see at least one dip in there. Then, speaking of 'scent', I'm reminded of the Tango in the movie Scent Of A Woman, and when I watch it again I think hmmm... maybe it IS possible to get that effect with a man taking the lead the way Pacino does...




I'm over-thinking this, aren't I? Actually, talking this through and looking up a few pictures and this video clip has helped some. I honestly think sometimes we need to do that when we get stuck: Take a step back, have a think, a bit of a Google, make coffee, get a visual image or two that might spark our imagination. Does that work for you guys too? Do you use similar methods? Or do you move on to the next scene until you can come back to the one you got stuck in with a clearer idea of what you need from it? Inquiring minds need to know!

Meanwhile, as the cold weather continues to work in my favour when it comes to keeping me indoors at the computer, all the animals that share my little corner of the universe seem to have taken to hibernating. Quite possibly to rub my nose in it that they can sleep all they want while I'm up half the night writing since it's quiet and there are less people queueing up to fill tubs of water. Naturally those same animals are awake when the people are filling the tubs of water during the day and couldn't possibly get those to people to let them out and in while they're here. Oh no. Mummy will tend to our every whim, even if it means interrupting her morning doze. We have her very well house trained. Am I the only person whose daily routine is dictated by those with four legs? And is it wrong that part of me smiled lots when I woke them all up with the camera flash when taking these pictures? It didn't feel wrong at the time...

So, just to make formal introduction for those not in the know; the one asleep on the back of the sofa is Daisy, the one who thinks he owns my bed is Max and the one who has her beddie (the one in my office) all to herself for a change is Doodle (Max also lays claim to half her beddie whenever he feels like it and as he's less than a third her size that means he wins). Don't they all look comfy? I think I'll just go take their pictures again to be sure...

15 comments:

Lacey Devlin said...

Your dance scene just sounds amazing. I'd have loved to be swept off my two left feet like that :D

Janet said...

I used to have dance years ago (The sort they do on Strictly and Dancing With The Stars)

That video clip of the tango scene shows 2 people who can't dance. (pretty much like your h and H)

The character portayed in the video has has probably had a few lessons at some time (at boarding school maybe?) He's maybe seen skilled dancers in action and he can keep time to the music and do a very good parody of a tango. He has the mood and essence of the dance nailed and the confidence to pretend he knows exactly what he's doing and to invent moves of his own.

She simply relaxing and letting him lead her. Maybe she did ballet as a child and knows enough about steps and co-ordination to go along with the game (and not stand on his toes)

I love her amusement--she knows they are bluffing but also knows that he's doing such a confident imitation that no one will realise they are winging it.

I don't reckon it would take years of dance training to do this. Your h and H should be able to do something similar.

The tango is a good dance to imitate -- it has no hip action so neither of them risk looking ridiculous by doing strange things with their hips (as they might in the rhumba.)

Melissa Blue said...

After writing this long I know when I'm doubting myself and when I need to come back later. It sounds like you may be having moments of doubt about this scene. The scene is believable if you build it up to be. The reader won't doubt you if you say he's learned how to dance. They'll be eating out of your hand if even though she's "following" his steps she's still very much in control. And it's the Tango. If you trace it's history you'd see it was made for bodies to touch, to tease the partner, and really upright sex. So basically if you treat it like a sex scene with clothes(less focus on inserting tab A into B. Or Left, right, quick step) you'll be fine. No worries.

Hope that helps.

Anyway, the story I was working on lost it's magic. I don't know why. So I'm letting myself get distracted with oh, shiny until it comes to me.

Sally Clements said...

Hi Trish. Here's a great tango clip for you, with Antonio Banderas, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6VvR3hkePI
Also scorching dancing in Thomas Crown affair remake with Pierce and Rene, but Rene is doing the running, so not really what you're looking for!

Sally Clements said...

Also I love strictly ballroom for that intimate dancing vibe. The way that he never stops looking into her eyes, and the closeness... scorching. Do you know strictly ballroom?

Donna Alward said...

Isn't it time you updated us again? Huh? :-)

Sally Clements said...

Hi Trish! I have just nominated you for a Kreativ Bloggers Award. Enjoy!

Heidi said...

Trish, just popping in a little late to say Hello!!

It's fantastic to see you back in action again. Had a little taste of that 'wading through treacle' malaise myself this year (and that was without any life issues) with a book that refused to get written and nearly destroyed me. Latest one is going much better... So I don't even care if it's crap at this stage, just that I can put the words on the paper without stressing over every single one.

Good luck with your latest, and love the sound of that dance scene!

Heidi x

Trish Wylie said...

Fingers crossed it ends up READING amazing, Lacey. I said to my SIL yesterday that knowing my luck it would get cut in revisions. Mind you, at this point I'd be happy just to HAVE revisions!

And I hear ya on the being swept off two left feet! *sigh*

Trish Wylie said...

Can't tell you how this comment and some of the emails/Facebook messages I got helped me with this scene, Janet!

The lines 'He has the mood and essence of the dance nailed' and 'the confidence to pretend he knows exactly what he's doing and to invent moves of his own' in particular were VERY helpful! So THANK YOU. :)

Trish Wylie said...

This was another comment that really helped, Melissa! *smooshes*

And you're SO on the money! I DID go back and look at the lead in to it. I had to ask myself why my heroine would allow herself to be led around the dance-floor in such a seductive dance. The answer to that may be DUH! But there had to be more than how he looks to it for her to end up being swept away enough to show exhibitionist tendencies in front of a group of very correct posh people and at least two of the bosses from her law firm. So when I went back in, I layered in a lot more sexual tension and built it up so that there was a smidge more unspoken challenge to the game of cat-and-mouse until my hero had a 'to hell with it moment' and stepped up to the plate. The second he did... well... it got easier to imagine after that ;)

LOL at the shiny! You're ME!

Trish Wylie said...

GREAT clip, Sally! It is more her than him, but even so, the 'mood' helped. ;) I do love me some Youtube clips...

Trish Wylie said...

It was kinda overdue, wasn't it Donna? I shall reply on you to poke me into action ;) In the same way my friend Sharon subtly pokes me about doing dishes when she comes round for coffee and can't find a mug...

No clean mug = WORDCOUNT, I tell her. :)

Trish Wylie said...

Thanks Sally. Do you have ANY IDEA how long it's taking me to think up SEVEN measly answers?!

Trish Wylie said...

Hi Heidi honey! And thank you for the welcome back ;)

That treacle thing BITES, doesn't it? What book number was it? I'm looking at my shelf and trying to remember when I first experienced it... Erm... book two was a revision-fest. Book three FLEW. Book five was the pineapple. I think my first experience of treacle was around about book ten or eleven. I know it was my third Modern Heat. Manhattan Boss was a pain in the ass too. Gabe's story... well in fairness that was just GABE. But it was L.A. Cinderella that brought me to my knees. Cried for a half hour every time I turned the laptop on. My poor editor became my therapist through that one. I think I yapped down the phone at least twice with her. REALLY don't want to ever go through that again - as much for her sake as mine. What I would REALLY like is some of the fairy dust that was hanging around for Her Unexpected Baby, His Mistress, His Terms and One Night With The Rebel Billionaire. I MISS THAT FEELING!

TOTALLY agree on the getting the words down part. That's pretty much were I am right now. I have to prove to myself I can still do it. Finishing the story is big step number one, then we'll see what happens from there...

Good to 'see' you my friend!